Odessits can be very snooty when it comes to any other city in the world Illichivsk. "Why do you want to go there?" my students asked. "There's nothing to do and nothing to see." Not that it stops people moving there. Home to Ukraine's most profitable port, the town named after Vladimir Illich Lenin was recently reported to have the highest per-capita income in the whole country, with a lower cost of living than its near neighbour along the coast. The beaches are cleaner, the beer cheaper, and the local football team lets you in for free. What more could you want from a Saturday afternoon?